{"id":1179,"date":"2012-01-31T17:02:52","date_gmt":"2012-01-31T23:02:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bmovienation.com\/?p=1179"},"modified":"2012-01-31T17:02:52","modified_gmt":"2012-01-31T23:02:52","slug":"maybe-the-devil-was-inside-but-the-crowd-was-heading-out","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bmovienation.com\/?p=1179","title":{"rendered":"Maybe The Devil Was Inside, But The Crowd Was Heading Out"},"content":{"rendered":"

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The Devil Inside has received so much bad publicity already, it\u2019s hard to pile on here and note that two people walked out of the Cinemark Louis Joliet (probably more than 10 percent of the audience on a Saturday morning) due to the movie\u2019s lack of merits. It\u2019s the first time since I started reviewing that I\u2019ve seen walkouts.<\/p>\n

But I\u2019m not going to spend a lot of time pondering the poor dialogue and flimsy acting in this one. After all, Paramount Pictures spent a paltry $1 million producing this movie, while it raked in $35 million over the weekend. Normally I wouldn\u2019t discuss earnings, because who cares, but I think that\u2019s an impressive return on investment worth noting, one which could have far-reaching consequences moving forward (although film followers probably said the same thing about The Blair Witch Project, to no avail). No script and a non-existent budget? Let\u2019s do it!<\/p>\n

Instead, think back to the dusty, pre-Internet days of 1988 (a timeframe which inspired two recent horror\/suspense flicks, but more on that later). The Last Temptation of Christ, Marty Scorsese\u2019s excellent drama about Jesus, manages to infuriate everyone even remotely related to Christianity. Filmgoers are treated to picket lines of Christians (full disclosure: I\u2019m one) hacked off at a portrayal of Christ they don\u2019t agree with (yet probably haven\u2019t seen Marty\u2019s fine film). The film sinks at the box office, despite its merits.<\/p>\n

Now it\u2019s 2012. The Devil Inside repeatedly takes aim at the bureaucracy and antiquated philosophies of the Catholic Church. The filmmakers even say \u201cThe Vatican did not endorse this movie\u201d right at the start. Yet no word of picket lines, angry, fist-shaking homilies against the film or mass boycotts.<\/p>\n

So what happened? I can think of a couple different hot-button issues that would mobilize American Catholics to sink a film with a moderately tangential topical storyline. I suspect this film succeeds without controversy because a) exorcism isn\u2019t sexy anymore and b) the movie is really bad, and bad movies don\u2019t draw derision.<\/p>\n

Back to the screen. The film begins in the scary year of 1989. Paranormal Activity 3 was set in 1988, so that two-year period has suddenly become the occult touchstone of choice. I\u2019ll blame the two-headed serpent of Guns \u2018N Roses and George H.W. Bush.<\/p>\n

Maria Rossi kills three priests involved in exorcising her. She\u2019s holed up in a filthy, hoarder house where the murders occur, which leads me to equate dirty basements to nasty killing. I ran for the vacuum after this one.<\/p>\n

Maria is shipped off to an asylum in the Vatican. Twenty years later, her daughter, Isabella, embarks to that Italian enclave for a mother-daughter reunion, although Isabella is filming a documentary. Therefore, we endure the shaky, hand-held (and sickness-inducing) camerawork that defined Blair Witch. Matter of fact, throughout Devil, we\u2019re treated\/forced to look at nods to Blair Witch, including close-up shots of Visine-needing eyeballs and engorged nostrils. Visine would have been an ideal product placement here.<\/p>\n

In Rome, Isabella hooks up with a couple rogue priests who perform exorcisms that the Vatican doesn\u2019t endorse. They use the equivalent of the multimedia arsenal a high school AV is armed with to perform this procedure, including multiple cameras, computer hookups and medical equipment too.<\/p>\n

Throughout, we\u2019re treated to the classic possession vs. mental illness conundrum, an interesting dilemma which deserved more screen time here. Mother-daughter-demon-swapping-asylum-breakout drama ensues, along with a suicide\/standoff involving Father David. It\u2019s all too much, and it all ends with a lesson: If you get in a car with a demon-possessed driver, wear a seatbelt.<\/p>\n

So what could have saved this one? Father Guido Sarducci! The great Don Novello (he played Guido) and a hearty dose of Catholic humor would have vastly improved this rogue-priests-on-adventure tale. I can see it now \u2014 Father Guido teams up with fellow clergyman Jack Black to exorcise patients the Vatican refuses to. It\u2019s the New Testament meets Ghostbusters, featuring Mel Gibson as a bumbling, confused Pope, whom Sarducci accuses of getting his appointment only due to his card trick acumen. I\u2019d buy my ticket online immediately.
\nQuotable moments<\/p>\n

\u201cAm I going to flip out one day? Is it a matter of time?\u201d \u2014 Isabella, wondering if she\u2019ll attract the same demons her mother did.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt felt like an old prison.\u201d \u2014 Isabella on her mother\u2019s asylum conditions.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou guys are performing exorcism without the church\u2019s permission?\u201d \u2014 Isabella to Priests Ben and David<\/p>\n

\u201cForget about the church, David!\u201d \u2014 Ben<\/p>\n

\u201cSomething horrible happened in 1989 and it wasn\u2019t Maria Rossi\u2019s fault.\u201d \u2014 Ben<\/p>\n

\u201c(Exorcism) changes you.\u201d \u2014 Ben, on being an exorcising priest<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve seen the devil way more than I\u2019ve seen God.\u201d \u2014 David, on his role as a rogue, exorcising priest
\nPreview profiling<\/p>\n

I think Cinemark missed the boat this week with regards to previewing movies I might be interested in. Rather than point me in the direction of God versus Satan docudramas, or even upcoming dark religion pieces, they thought I\u2019d be interested in car chases, explosions and fighting. Don\u2019t get me wrong, I like all that stuff, but I like it all in the safety of my own neighborhood.
\nProduct placement protocol<\/p>\n

No oddly placed diamond company crucifixes or drug company nods at the asylum were apparent here. Then again, with its $1 million budget, Paramount didn\u2019t need any extra corporate cash to produce this one. But someone should have contacted Visine.
\nOther observations at the moviehouse:<\/p>\n

The upcoming Underworld: Awakening, besides making me want to upchuck, looks like a mashup between King Kong and Mortal Kombat.
\n Bruce Willis jumps out of a wonderful-looking, mid-\u201870s El Camino in the upcoming GI Joe: Retaliation. The Camino\u2019s cameo might be the highlight of the film, based on the previews.
\n For two weeks in a row, it\u2019s been cold at the Cinemark. Maybe the manager is keeping it cold on Saturday morning to boost breakfast popcorn sales?
\n Chronicle features teens that gain supernatural powers and use them to cause havoc, like car accidents and convenience store mayhem. Sounds good, but throw in a scene where they use their powers to ace the SAT, date the most popular cheerleader and summon a storm to cancel school the day of a tough test and I\u2019m in.
\n The Dictator, featuring Sacha Baron Cohen, looks amusing, compared to the superhero scrapple headed to the theater in 2012.<\/p>\n

Dave Wilson Romeoville