Re-Making The Thing (Again)

One morning last week, while enjoying my coffee, I stumbled across that headline in Daily Variety. I nearly did one of those Danny Thomas spit-takes.

For those not fluent in the rat-a-tat La-La-Land verse of Variety-speak, that announcement means that Universal Pictures is planning to remake John Carpenter’s 1982 masterpiece The Thing. This is a colossal boner on so many levels I don’t even know where to begin.

I’ll never understand why Hollywood feels the need to remake perfectly good films, let alone classics like this one. You want to remake the original Ocean’s 11, knock yourself out. The original was crap. But this feels like Gus Van Sant’s Psycho all over again, doesn’t it?

I’m aware that Carpenter’s film was itself a remake (kinda) of Howard Hawks’ 1951 sci-fi flick The Thing From Another World. But even though Hawks was a genius, that movie wasn’t proof of it.

I have to agree. I can still remember how frightening that was. The 1950’s one wasn’t scary at all to me, but John Carpenter’s leave it alone! With all this blizzard weather maybe I ought to see it again so I can be really, really, really scared all over again!