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Murderers’ Row (1966)

MASTER PLAN: Operation:Scorch – use a new heat ray on Washington DC. After “The Silencers,” there was no where to go but with more fun in the sun with Matt Helm – poking fun, that is, at the James Bond spy genre. Dino Martin is as lackadaisical as ever as Helm, the part-time super agent, barely awake in some scenes and ready with the cute quips in, well, every line of dialog. To illustrate the difference between Helm & Bond: Bond, as an example, is allowed one minor joke during his usual mission briefing with M. Now, Helm jokes with his boss, MacDonald (James Gregory, reprising his role) during the entire session, even as MacDonald tells him that Helm may have to commit suicide during the mission. ‘I ain’t going’ Helm quips. The villains are again the evil organization Big-O(oh), who target all the major secret agents as the film starts, including Helm. But, this is one of those false deaths for the hero, just as was done in a couple of the Bonders (and they don’t explain how Helm survives). The action takes Helm to Monte Carlo, where a primarily young crowd do a lot of dancing and swinging. Helm searches for a scientist who is providing Big-O (led by Karl Malden) with the final formulas for a super heat ray.

The action slows down at the mid-point, especially with the seemingly endless scenes of young folks shaking their bodies to sixties tunes. The filmmakers manage to work Sinatra in again in a sort-of cameo. The absurdity and sight gags are at the usual level: all of Helm’s girlfriends attend his funeral dressed exactly the same. The main henchman walks around in public with this big metal plate covering the top of his head and no one notices. Helm drinks while driving and on the job, joking with the liquor bottles. Ann-Margret plays the daughter of the missing scientist and she’s always great, no matter what she’s doing, but she even gets quite involved in some strenuous action towards the end. Sparv is fine as the femme fatale, with her slightly exotic good looks, though she inexplicably seems to change sides near the end (Helm never even had a chance to seduce her). Malden as the head villain does not do as well, speaking with a dopey accent which fades in and out. He is the subject of an effective on-going gag with a gun that delays firing for a few seconds. The climactic action in the villains’ lair is not bad, with some actual suspense and humor mixed in, though the very conclusion on the hovercrafts, on the water, seems like an afterthought. The epilogue is just too silly. Helm would return in “The Ambushers.” Hero:6 Villain:5 Femme Fatales:7 Henchmen:6 Fights:6 Stunts/Chases:6 Gadgets:5 Auto:4 Locations:7 Pace:6 overall:6-