Deathsport (1978)

Holy Mozzarella! I can not believe this was *not* made by Italians. It’s about as bonkers as Castellari’s THE NEW BARBARIANS. And it’s definitely far more warped. David Carradine plays some kind of futuristic hippie-warrior (they call them Range Guides, or Mystical Nomads if you will). He gets captured, imprisoned and forced to play the Deathsport game. He escapes on a silver bike, together with his fellow-hippie love interest and some blond dude who can’t act. The rest of the movie they get chased by the evil Richard Lynch on a bike. Oh, and there’s mutants running around the wastelands too. Bonkers, I tell you.

There are a few charming matte-paintings to behold (mainly of two futuristic cities). Lots of psychedelic color schemes, full frontal female nudity and utterly spaced-out sounds. Will you just listen to those motorcycles when they fly by? They either sound like they’re screaming or farting. Even those plastic see-through swords of Carradine & his girl make undefinable “weesh”-sounds. Those big red-laser-beaming hand-blasters are pretty mind-boggling too. People and things get all red and vanish into thin air when they get hit.

One of the highlights is the sequence where Carradine (on his bike) gets chased by Lynch and his henchmen (also on bikes, of course). They drive into some abandoned military domain, and end up driving some sort of improvised but pre-arranged race circuit. There’s really no explanation as to why it’s there. It’s just there, although it shouldn’t be. Plus, during their pursuit, things just keep blowing up and randomly catch fire.

In the end, Carradine and Lynch get to face off one another during a weirdly edited sword-boss-fight. The outcome? Evil Lynch gets decapitated and Carradine gets the girl. I love it when a movie ends that way! Well, not just any movie, of course. Only the ones that star David Carradine as a womanizing hero. Well, “womanizing” probably isn’t the exact word; as she’s more like some soul-mate or something. But whatever, he gets the chick and that’s what counts.