If I were to say the name “Albert Pyun”, chances are pretty good you’d draw a blank. “Cyborg”? Uhh, isn’t that a Van Damme film or something? Yeah. “Radioactive Dreams”? Cult movie from the 80s maybe? Sci-fi? Yup. Same guy as this Conan ripoff? Yup. And over 40 other films in less than 30 years. Man’s been prolific – if not particularly good.
Well, he started off on the right foot, even if this low-budget affair is cheesy, goofy, and most definitely made to cash in on the Schwarzenegger film’s success; or presumptive success might be a better way to put it, as it was actually released a few weeks before John Milius’ bigger-budgeted, better-marketed film. In fact (and this blew my mind) it had almost exactly the same box office gross, at least in the USA, as the film that made Arnie a star – $40 million or so, a substantial amount for a low-budget indie in those days.
Why the film hasn’t stayed in the public consciousness and why the promised sequel (mentioned in the end credits crawl) had to wait until this year, remains a mystery to me after re-watching the film last week. The plot is pretty basic and really rather inconsequential: evil Cromwell takes over the peaceful kingdom of Ehdan with the help of monstrous undead sorcerer Xusia, killing the king and his family but missing young Talon, he of the three-bladed sword, who will eventually grow into strapping he-man Lee Horsley and come back for revenge, along the way saving gorgeous Princess Alana (Kathleen Beller) and her brother Micah, who believes himself to be the rightful heir in the absence of Talon. There’s lots of fairly mediocre and unconvincing swordplay, plenty of shots of the half-naked Horsley for the ladies and the scantily-clad Beller and other nubile vixens for the guys, rather dreamy overlit photography that helps camouflage the overall cheapness of the sets and costumes, and a musical score that’s rousing if rather shameless in its ripping off of 40s swashbuckler stuff and even for a moment “Gone With the Wind”.
But what makes the film work is the sense of humor it has about itself, and Horsley’s charisma. How can anybody take the triple-sword (which fires two of its blades like crossbow bolts) seriously, or do anything but laugh when Talon is crucified on a big wooden X at a wedding celebration but pulls the spikes out of his hands (mostly in slow-mo of course) and then goes on to start chopping up the bad guys as if nothing happened? The film has an energy and verve that for me more than makes up for some really ludicrous lapses in plotting near the end, and I for one wish that a sequel starring Horsley had been made. This is Pyun’s highest-rated film on the IMDb and judging from what else I’ve seen and the descriptions and comments on a few others, probably deserves to be. Too bad – it’s far from a great film, but it’s sad that the director has become such a joke ever since.
