Cold Ground (2017)

Here we have a movie that so desperately wants to be something akin to Blair Witch you can almost taste it.

What you get instead is an interminably dull movie that mostly consists of shots of scenery and the backs of peoples heads as they trudge through the snow. Then trudge through the snow some more. Then, for a change, they trudge through the snow.

And when our antagonist does show up FIFTY MINUTES into this eighty-five minute movie, it’s a blurry mess that leaves you squinting desperately at the screen for SOME sort of payoff for your patience. Let me just tell you, before you waste your time like I did, there isn’t one.

Avoiding spoilers, I will warn you that the last 8 minutes of this movie consist of five minutes of shaky cam staring at walls and two minutes of running before an insulting abrupt ending.

Just….don’t waste your time. You want a decent movie about people getting lost in the woods and terrible things happening to them? Go watch The Ritual. This ain’t worth your time.