Some friends and I have watched many terrible films, but this is the absolute pinnacle of C-movie grandeur. It contains awful acting, a porn-quality soundtrack, poorly overdubbed speech (in some of which the actors forgot their exact words, so you can tell they’re not speaking the same line), completely pointless nudity, and repetitive location work. All the characters speak a senseless mix of Olde and contemporary English, frequently misusing thous and thys. The special effects seem as if they were done on an old Apple II. And at the core of this shining gem is a story so fragmented, so spur-of-the-moment, that it hurts the head to see. There are plenty of phenomenal lines in this film, worthy of quotation when you want to get a laugh. All in all, I consider Roller Blade to be one of the best worst films I’ve ever seen.
